My Lecturer has reviewed and made the following suggestions

 

So, I have had a scan of it.

 

What you should concentrate on is demonstrating how the two papers you have reviewed lead to your analysis.

 

A literature review has several parts to it:

 

Intro – this is done

Methodolgy – this is done

Results (you have called this methodology 2 – this should be changed to results – this is done and is the section when you have reviewed the papers. What you haven’t done much, if anything on is critical analysis (were these two research projects done well – internal validity; and are the two papers useful to you – external validity).

Discussion – this is when you discuss the results of the two papers and introduce other evidence to support it. This usually done by theme. You have done this but you also have another heading that says ‘literature review’ you need to get rid of this.  

Recommendations – these will be easy to write. Try to write one for future research, one for the organisation and one for you personally.

Conclusion – you have done this.

This is really important, and I wish you had more time, but this is what you need to do:

 

You MUST MUST MUST provide some critical analysis of the two papers, concentrate on any weaknesses you see in them and point this out.

Save words by cutting your analysis down. Concentrate on the key things that you found out in the two papers.

You need to include the Gannt chart and explain what it is. At the moment it does not make any sense at all.

So, make sure before you submit you do the following:

Provide critical analysis of the papers – this is really important – was it done well (internal validiity)? Does it apply to you and your staff (external validity). Make sure you say these words in your analysis of the papers.

Cut down your discussion section

Include some recommendations

Make the Gannt chart clear

Proof-read it – there is a mistake in the first sentence – I am currently employed as a Locality Manager working for an Ambulance Service in the (an) NHS Trust

To be clear, . It won’t pass as it is, but it should pass if you do the five things above.

 

Total 6000 words, it well exceeds this at present. Condense this