Parent–child relationships may include communication that “shoots the other person down,” which often adds fuel to negative situations. Assess the effect of harsh communication patterns between parents and children, and generate alternative patterns of communication. 

1. Discuss whether you have ever used or heard these kinds of statements. 

• I don’t understand why you do these things. 
• How could someone with your brains and your background do such a thing? 
• I’m stumped; you really have confused me. 
• I do not understand how one little _____ is going to hurt you. 
• You never tell me what you’re thinking. 
• I demand an apology. 

2. Discuss the manifest and latent meanings of these statements. 

• I don’t understand why you do these things. 
• How could someone with your brains and your background do such a thing? 
• I’m stumped; you really have confused me. 
• I do not understand how one little _____ is going to hurt you. 
• You never tell me what you’re thinking. 
• I demand an apology. 

3.For each statement, generate a healthier alternative statement. 

• I don’t understand why you do these things. 
• How could someone with your brains and your background do such a thing? 
• I’m stumped; you really have confused me. 
• I do not understand how one little _____ is going to hurt you. 
• You never tell me what you’re thinking. 
• I demand an apology.